We think "New Year resolution- Let's make changes...BUT- We can make changes anytime of the year and a BIG one is around the past!
I started this blog on February 9, 2014 and I wrote...
It's a new year, a new day, a new week, which means new beginnings.
The traditional new year comes with the desire to change things. None of you may be planning on making any major changes in your lives, but I suggest you make a choice to let go! That means to be free of the past. Whatever happened before today is now in the past and should stay there. As human beings we have a memory 100,000 times more powerful than any computer and a soul memory that remembers things from past lives. Ever wonder why you fear certain things that just logically don't add up or make sense?
For example I can't snorkle, I hyperventalate. When some friends and I went to Mexico, in 1992, I tried to snorkle for the first time and I just could not do it. I remember trying and making this humming sound, not sure why haha but it sure didn't help. I remember saying, "I must have drown in a past life!"
I realized since trying to snorkle that I have this anxiety when I'm in water. I'm fine in the shower, hot tubs, and pools, but get me in a lake or the ocean and I'm UNeasy!
Many, many years ago I went to the lake with a group of friends. While on the boat various people would take turns attempting to wakeboard. Over the duratation of the two or three days several of my friends attempted to talk me into trying it. I had no interest or desire to wakeboard, so I repeatenly declined, mainly because only two out of the ten were actually able to get up and actually wakeboard. It looked very difficult and was very frusterating for the person trying to get up, but also for me too! It was a very long process and requires a lot of patience. The boat would stop and a new person would jump in the water, with their life vest and a wakeboard. They had to slip their feet into the wakeboard foot holes and then grab the line and then the boat would start to go- meanwhile pulling the person behind it. Most times while they are starting to be pulled they loose hold of the cord, leaving them stranded so then the boat has to go up and turn around to come back to where the person let go. Then we throw the line out again and then they hold on and the boat gasses it again and then they start to get up and then they quickly crash. So the boat goes back to get them once again. This happens numerous times until they say alright so and so is going to try it now. Most times the person hops back into the boat and waits their turn to try again to get up to actually attempt to wakeboard.
To make a long story short the group encouraged me repeatenly to try it so I finally did. Me and my anxiety, fear and butt hopped into the water and slipped my feet into the wakeboard. Once I did that the board was forcing my upper body to be forced back and into the water, so I had to use my stomach mussles to do sort of a sit up exersize with my mussles to get my head to stop from emerging into the water. They through out the line, someone said "Hit it!" The boat gasses it and I did what they said, lean back, hold onto the rope and pull yourself up and out of the water.
I did just that! I popped up out of that water like a pop tart! I was doing it! I was wakeboarding! I went to the side and to the other side. Water was splashing into my face and eyes, but I couldn't wipe them, because I was holding on to that cord for dear life! Finally after a while of just riding... it became kind of boring and so I just let go. They were all happy that I tried it and actually did it, but more so they were shocked at how I got up the first time I ever tried it. And to be honest I think it was that I didn't want to be in that water HAHA!
I know the fear and anxiety I had has something to do with a past life! How do I know this?... well nothing has ever happened in this lifetime that I can recall around fear or a bad experience in the water.
Now that is one way of realizing the past will show up around us and have an effect on our lives. Sometimes we choose to hold onto the pain and hurt from a past relationship and we choose to remember it. We actually get comfortable with that hurt and anger or feelings that link us to that past pain we suffered. Sometimes we fear feeling that pain again so much that we won't get into another relationship out of fear of experiencing that pain again. Not realizing that we are allowing that person to continue to hurt and keep us from experiencing happiness and any love even years after they left us or we left them - in turn allowing them to stop us from being happy which allows them to continue to have a negative impact on our lives, even after the damage they caused we could allow them to damage, effect us after they are a part of our past which is supposed to be history! I have seen this happen so many times with family, friends, clients as well as myself.
If I had one wish I would wish that today and every day we can start new. Choose a fresh new path. Let go of the past. Realize that when we are in the past, thinking about the pain or experience of the past we are looking back and relating with the past in the present. We are activating that energy. We are talking about it, thinking about it and manifesting it.
When I'm in session with someone, I always say I don't care why you do what you do, or don't do what you don't do. That was you before. I know our past has an impact on our future but it doesn't have to be our future. I also don't do past life regression or readings. Mainly because I could tell you that your were a prince or even a frog and how would you know if this was true? It just seems very fairytalish to me. Plus I'm bout today and the future. Healing from the past and looking forward and picking the way we want things to go. I aren't little kids anynore and that means we can choose to make it whatever we want it to be.
Not all are able to forget certain incidences or circumstances we've experienced in our lifes, but the end result is how we handle it and it's really up to us. You have that power. I've had a horrible childhood. Horrific childhood! I have always said that I wouldn't change my past if I could because I like who I turned out to be and if what happened to me didn't happen to me, I may not be who I became to be. I'm not going to say it was easy but I am going to say it made me the caring, feeling, loving compassionate, woman I am with integrity!
Positive thoughts can help take us through anything life throws our way.
One of my instructors said to us one day- "The key to happiness is accepting what is."
I believe this and letting go is the key to being free from it all!
Lets start the NEW YEAR NEW, FRESH, AND FREE!
I wish you blessings, happiness, love and many laughs in this new year!! 2014 The Year of the Horse! The year of new beginning.
It's amazing how one person could ruin your day in a blink of an eye! In a split second! It is even more amazing how one person could change your horrible day into a great day in a split second, just like that!
It was May 21, 2014 and I was having a horrible day, well at that point and time to be completely honest, it had really been a horrible month and just an odd weird year! It was one of those days where you wish you could just stay home in bed, be around no one and do nothing!
But not an option when your registration is about to expire. So on this yucky day I was walking up to the entry doors of DMV, and really dreading the whole DMV experience, and as I approach the door there was a man walking out. He made a point to hold the door, but in a very unique way, he scoots aside with a little, what looked like bunny hop, still holding the door open, he does this little bend of of the knees, like a dip, as puts his arm out and says, "Welcome to DMV" with a big smile as he giggles. Clearly he didn't work there and made it a point to just be funny and silly at the same time.
He actually made me laugh out loud and in a spilt second, he managed to completely shifted my energy and state, changing my mood just like that! In the blink of an eye! I sit here today thinking what a funny guy! Does he know that he just made my day? Does he know that those two seconds made enough of an impact of me, my day and life that I never forgot it? And does he know his little silliness prompted me to publicly speak about it and share? No, I honestly don't think he realized what he did. We need more people acting funny and silly like him in the world! I think we should be aware of the impact thirty seconds could have on a life, and attempt to be silly, funny, happy or cute, because 20 seconds of silly could impact another's life that second or forever.
Has this ever happened to you? I'm absolutely positive someone has shifted you into the negative, because that is so easy to do in our crazy fast paced world. For example while driving in traffic, someone cuts you off, that split second you could snap right out of your mellow state and good mood, right into irritation and for some, maybe so angry that you go into a fit of road rage. In the blink of an eye! Just like that! But has anyone ever shifted your energy state or frame of mind into positivity in a split second? Like this guy did at the DMV? Just like that "Ta Dah!"?
I mean I was dragging my but around until he crossed my path and then I was laughing and snapped into a better mood.
Can you be like this guy just once in a while? I know I will do what I can to smile and say hi to as many people possible, and say thank you to as many people that I can, in my life.
I know, for me, that always shifts my energy, knowing how I helped someone that I cared for and hearing them express how happy they are that I'm a part of their path or life. Or maybe say how proud I am of someone in my life, or maybe just I love you!
Yes, that's a plan to help shift their energy!
Thank you for reading and visiting my site.
I'm sending love and light,
I know in my own experience I find myself in a space where I'm on auto pilot sometimes I park and I don't know how I got home. Sometimes we are in such a rush trying to get "it" all done by a certain date or time.. which requires us to be "on" and in our heads all of the time. Thinking, analyzing or reminiscing. It's like the plug is plugged in, and your appliance is drawing electricity! Or maybe you feel like you're on the clock! Working away.
This is especially true for me lately. Today, July 3, the day before a holiday is always more stressful and then if we have added stress like going through particular dramas, if it be family, work related, or having relationship issues, it's like the the wheels are rolling. The brain is plugged in, chugging away. This allows our stress levels to be higher than we'd like. The anxiety also could be higher. Everything is on!
This is when we need, especially need to turn it all off, pull back, and shut down. I always say "unplug your cord" Meditation is a great way to do this. When in session many times I suggest meditation sometimes I can feel energy just tighten up just saying the word meditation, and then a quick jolt of fear or anxiety. Sometimes I hear how can I do that or when would I be able to do it... most times I sense frustration or disappointment around this subject.
Somethings I hear range from I don't know how, I can't quiet my mind chatter, or I just don't have time to relax. But as a provider of guidance around living a more spiritual life we need to make time!! Take time to disconnect from it all. Period!
Dance lessons are a great way to disconnect. How can you think about life or what's going on at work when the music is loud and your watching somebody do certain dance moves. I mean you're so focused and trying to learn how to do it that you don't realize it, but you've disconnected from "it, all." Dancing actually brings sort of a fairy energy to your mind, body, and soul. Dancing happens to be a great way of moving energy that had been stuck out stagnant and it sidetracks you and allows you to disconnect from it all. And with a dance class because it's scheduled, you could pencil it in on your calender, which makes it is easier to stay on routine and commit to it.
Another way of disconnecting is
writing in a journal. You could also use any electronic devise that has a version or note pad, or on your cellular phone too! When you start to journal or start a blog, it's releasing, and sorting, which could also also be known as venting, and processing. It's getting those thoughts out. It's like vomiting it all up. Gross I know lol
But I know I always feel much better once I vomit haha okay or in other words when I tell a close friend about all the crap that has been happening in my crazy life. It's sharing and getting it off or chest, as they put it. Writing an email or a hand written letter to that person that you're having issues with letting them know how you feel, releasing it. Doesn't mean you have to send it, but connecting with your feelings, sending those thoughts down your arm, writing them, seeing them is a way of releasing too!
And that's the same idea when you journal. Getting it out. Blogging for me is a great too, expecially if you want or need feedback around something that has my thoughts stuck.
You could also pray and request assistance to help you release it! You could have your chakras balanced and have them energetically cleared. You could ask your Angels, God, your Higher Source and Self, Buddha, your Saints, the Universe, Mother Earth, Mother Mary, or Divine white light. ... (It's all the same "Spirit") to help you stay grounded and ask that they assist in releasing any tension and guide you into being more relaxed, spiritual, and faithful because that's an awesome place to be.
Thank you for taking the time to read, learn and absorb all of this.
I am sending you love and light,
Cutting cords is also a great way off disconnecting and releasing.
Thank you for reading and listening!
I'm sending you love and light,
Have a great day!
"The key to happiness is accepting what is" -Peej ♡
What is meditation?
Google says: med·i·tate
gerund or present participle: meditating
think deeply or focus one's mind for a period of time, in silence or with the aid of chanting, for religious or spiritual purposes or as a method of relaxation.
think deeply or carefully about (something).
"he went off to meditate on the new idea"
synonyms: contemplate, think, consider, ponder, muse, reflect, deliberate, ruminate, chew the cud, brood, mull something over; More
plan mentally; consider.
"they had suffered severely, and they began to meditate retreat"
Peej's definition of meditation is disconnecting from it all and going to a quiet, peaceful state or space resulting in calmness, less stress, and peace and zenful moments.
I always say pretend like your an appliance. Even though you're not toasting bread that doesn't mean you're not drawing a electrical current. Ask PG&E they will confirm, even when an appliances is not on, it still draws electricity. That's why they say unplug your appliances when you're not using them. So I always say to my clients, "Unplug your cord from the wall."
As human, we are trained or maybe brainwashed to connect, and that connection is good, but not that connection is good and that we need to disconnect too. There has to be balance... and that means we need to disconnect the cord and shut down, and mediate.
This is especially important when we are dealing with stressful situations, divorce, moving, relationship issues, family drama, etc. Our minds tell us to solve, think, analyze, talk about, go over and over, or worry about things uncontrollably, but this is when it is so important to disconnect, unplug and meditate. It's like a cool off period. Disconnect, mediate then process. Once you train your brain to disconnect and quiet, then we get answers, guidance, or messages without any effort. Because when I drop down, I actually hear Spirit and this is how I read most people I hear my Spirit Guides or your Loved Ones talk.
Meditation is dropping down into that space where you are relaxed and open. When we sleep sometimes we achieve this state, but most times we have all this activity going on in our minds while we sleep, called dreams. Haven't you ever woke up and all of the sudden things that were troubling you just become so clear, and you know the answer or the right thing to do? That's because you allowed your mind to disconnect.
And no you can't just sleep and chalk it up as disconnecting! Sorry Charlie!
So many people suffer from hypertension or anxiety. This world would be such a better, peaceful place if everyone took one, just one ten-minute mediation break twice a day. I would even settle for one a day. Imagine the effect that would have on road ragers. I'm pretty sure it would lower the occurrences if people learned how to disconnect and find that disconnecting exercise that worked for them.
Knowledge is the first step. Knowing that something needs to change and then learning how to change it, then actually applying what you've learned is the tricky part. That's why I always say do it in the shower, do it when you wake up or go to bed. Or take a class that you have to go to every night at 7pm. Implementing it into your routine is the most important key, routine, because I've learned to have peace and that quiet time, meditation or disconnecting is crucial to my spiritual health.
Over the years I've learned that my definition of meditation is different from others, so here are a few, not all, but a few variations of meditation or disconnecting that will help your mind body and soul. You may need to try one or several of them to know which ones work for you, and that's simple just do a mind, body, spirit check-in before and after you try one of my suggestions, and then see how it affected you. How do you feel after? If you don't feel good, calm or relaxed maybe you'll need to try the next one on the list.
I have the gift of creation so for me any type of art work where I am in deep, concentration or designing or creating things, like making jewelry, sewing, painting, if it be a wall or a picture, or pencil drawing. This is a great way for me to disconnect from it all and then I have some beautiful creations.
Last night I was home alone and I took a few of my grandmother's recipes out and made meat boats and today I'm making goodidoonie. "Cooking"- this falls under meditation for me. Making jams & jellies also works very well for my soul. This year has been a little more stressful than other years so I must have made twenty-five batches of jelly, where usually I make, maybe ten. It has also been a very odd year for me so making jelly really helps me plus everyone rants and raves at how yummy it is, so that makes me feel good, it does something to my mind and soul. Disconnect "equals" Peej feels good.
For some people yoga is great! I always say yoga got me through college. College was very stressful for me, being a single only parent, with health problems, a struggling starving student that I was (haha) I think one of the college counselors suggested I take a yoga class on campus. So I did and after that I always made sure I had a yoga class, two days a week. It was easy to disconnect, and stay on track with my overwhelmed crazy busy schedule because it was scheduled, I had to be there rain or shine. Yoga really helped my mind, body, and soul. I always say yoga is like hitting three birds with one stone. I know that's an old saying, but you get the idea- it works good haha!
Now-a-days I buy a month of yoga deal on Groupon and then I procrastinate and never use it, but I go to Zumba. Which is another amazing way of disconnecting.
Dance lessons. We all like to move or shake our booties. I try to learn the routine by following the instructor. If it be learning how to two-step or a Zumba class, forces me to be in the moment, and disconnect from reality, even if it is for just an hour! Trying to keep up and learn the routine makes me crazy and laugh at the same time, but then after that class, I feel great!
Some endorphins were released. And dancing has always done something to my soul, even if I'm watching another do it.
Singing in the shower- You could set time aside to listen to some of your favorite song and just be in the moment, feeling that beat and sing away your little heart. I don't care if you're at work and you have to take a ten minute break, go out and sit in your car, close your eyes (very important piece to the puzzle) and blast your favorite music and sing. It would only take three songs. Do you think you could do that? You see that's disconnecting and good for your soul- and it takes under ten minutes and could be done anywhere.
Playing an instrument- also another great disconnection. A very important person in my life plays the drums and that is how he connects with his gift, but at the same time it's disconnection from the rigmarole of life and routine. When you play music you're in a different space. When you write a song you're in a different space also. You're in the music, the beat.
Fishing, praying, chanting,
Sitting on the beach- I always say taking a few deep breathes while watching the waves, birds, and the people around you, then closing your eyes for a few minutes and listening to the waves, birds and sounds of the people around you, then again open your eyes for a few minutes and admire the beauty, the sky, the ocean and it's movement of the crashing waves, but notice the stillness for miles out, and then closing your eyes.....Back and forth for about ten or twelve minutes is all it takes. Just the sand and the ocean already does something to my soul.
Guided meditations are great! I have a few that I wrote and recorded that help a lot of people learn how to get yourself to that relaxed state on YouTube, subscribe to my channel "Medium Peej" listen to one a day and see how you feel after. If you feel calm, clear and relaxed maybe guided meditation is one of your ways of disconnecting, because we may have more that one and it may work for years and then you may need to switch it up.
Running, skating, working out- Most people have their Ipods on while at the gym. That's a great way of disconnecting from the people around you. Can they talk to you while you're at the gym? Nope! Because they can see your ears are plugged with some awesome tunes and you're in your own world.
Let me know how these go for you, or if you have any other suggestions that may help others disconnect, because I'm always open to learning something new everyday!
You could read my other meditation blogs to get some other ideas too!
Thank you for listening. I am sending you love & light.
Today was my late day I was supposed to be able to sleep one hour longer, but this didn't happen because my grandmother decided to wake me up with chitter chatter in my ear about things that need to be done, changes that need to be made, how to do them and when. It's all kinds of good information but to early in the morning though! When she was alive I remember she would love to wake me up. I would drive to Sacramento to visit her on my days off and I wanted to sleep in. I mean why couldn't I do the two birds with one stone and visit her on my day off and sleep in? But no she had different idea for me. She was an early bird so she'd be in the kitchen slamming cupboards and making all kinds of noise. I knew it was intentional to wake me up I used to lay there and feel so irritated and one time I was almost in tears, so one time I said something to her, and when I speak of this now, I want to laugh, because she would never hesitate to do what she wanted or thought was right. My grandparents were one of a kind. She would push her way to the front and my Grandfather would say whatever was on his mind, he didn't care if he hurt your feelings or what other's thought. He was what some would consider rude because he was very out spoken, stubborn and would get aggressive at times. But my Grandmother was just a little pushy. She would always tell me he that my grumpy Grandfather liked me and I knew he didn't. He was mean. He was a horse in the Chinese astrology and I'm a monkey, is what my cousin says...now it all makes sense to me why he didn't take a liking to me. It's a Chinese Astrology thing! Lol
Anyways back to my Grandmother she is a very funny woman she'd wake me up when I would visit her by making noise and slamming things and she would always say when I visited that I'd have plenty of time to sleep when I was dead. That was her philosophy, and now she is showing me from the other side so she decided to wake me up early and she does that quite often and we had to have a little talk this morning so I'm hoping that doesn't happen anymore, but she does give me some good advice and ideas where to make some changes. And she let me know she loves me and guides me and that it's pretty amazing that I can hear see and feel Loved Ones that have crossed over to the other side.
I am very thankful to have a direct connection to Spirit, and my Guides especially thankful that my grandmother has chose me, to be one of my amazing spiritual Guide and connections.
I was feeling irritated, but I chose to feel blessed and thankful.
Do you have a connection to Spirit?
Do you ever wake up and just have no idea why? Prior to my Spiritual Path or awareness I moved nine times in ten years. I always thought it was the loud neighbors or the dog barking or the busy noisey.... It was Spirit!
You may hear Spirit and not understand. Maybe you're a Medium too!
You need to do the work.
As a Spiritual Healer and Communication Life Coach sometimes things are undetermined, meaning there isn't an answer just yet, maybe the outcome isn't decided yet which would mean it's not viewable by anyone or maybe it could either way depending on freewill, and just maybe you need to do the work to move closer to that outcome. Or simply you may still need to learn, shift your energy, accept or in another words make some realizations or life changes before things are clearer for you, or for me, as a Healer to see. For example: any of you that have had a session with me know that I do not ask why you are coming in for a session or reading with me, nor do I ask what is your birth date is. Because I am a no-tools reader, a Medium that hears, sees and feels Spirit, an Empath which means I feel energy vibrations and the emotions and pain of others, and an Energy Healer which means I read energy and have a gift of healing.
There are many other modalities...
An Astrologer studies the planets and their alignment, the date you were born into this world the planets were in a certain order and there is a system they use that can tell you a lot about youself. just by the date you were born, and even more precisely with knowing what time you were born. This is a tool that a gifted intuitive could use to help them read you based on synchronicity around astrology signs. Then there is Numerology which is the study of numbers. Each letter in your name has a number, for example if your name has an A in it, it is 1 point and a S may be 7 then you add them up and do these calculations and come up with a number that they call life force number or life purpose number...etc. and then each letter symbolizes something for example J stands for "Justice." So there are karmic values that come with your birthdate & name as you enter into this life, life lessons or a life path as some call it. The Chinese have a system they use called Chinese Astrology which I hear is very accurate. The Chinese use it when hiring someone for their company or matching up a potential partnership, if it be business or marriage.
Then you could also come to card reader, Angel Cards, Tarot etc... With the cards being a Reader's tool to guide them usually in combination with their own intuition. A lot of times a reader will ask what your birth date is or just flat out ask what is going on in your life or what is the question you'd like to ask?
I always say sit down, be quiet, and put your seat belt on! And I do all of the talking, and I say you can ask questions at the end, but nine times out of ten you won't end up having any!
I like to do it this way because then the person knows this is what I heard, felt or saw without any prompting from them, and all from Spirit, if it be their Spirit Guides, loved ones whom have passed, or our Angels or. ...
Most times I do see the outcome or get a hit or feeling, but sometimes I don't see the outcome.
And then don't forget we all have free will.
I could say I see a baby. .. And sometimes I know where that person is on a lifeline and I know they already have that baby, but just for example purposes.... I see a baby, because I see babies sometimes in front of the person, I may say I see a baby and I will say I see a baby. And she will say I don't have a baby and think to her self hell no I don't have nor do I want a baby. She leaves my office, freewill comes in play, because she doesn't want to have kids and she could be on birth control, maybe become celibate or even divorce her husband to avoid that baby that I saw!
All of her attempts to avoid having that baby she doesn't want may not work because if it's destiny, five years later she may be out for a high school reunion, do a few shots of tequila (to kill ya- hahaha) and wake up the next day next to this man and then find out a couple weeks later that she's pregnant and ta da! just like that she's pregnant and there's that baby I saw.
So sometimes you need to do the work, have faith, trust and be patient and wait to figure things out. We do have freewill, but we also are destine to be who we contacted to be prior to entering into our bodies into this lifetime.
We have life lessons to accomplish and a soul purpose and many blessings to experience, some not so fun but most amazing. And pushing the fear aside definitely helps!
Thank you for listening.
I started this blog in the morning on my cell phone, this was after I did two of my guided mediations, but I didn't have time to upload it, because I had to be in my office and I will be darn if this blog was channeled and written for the guy that I read in my office! His reading was around this message and having children. I actually read it to him and both of us were in amazement of how amazing Spirit is to channel these messages and this topic before I even read him and then double amazement with how amazing his session was. That's called divine messages from the Holy Spirit, or Angels and what I call divine-ness! Thank you Angels! Thank you Holy Spirit!
This is actually the second time that this has happened! And it's one of those wow moment, for sure!
It's April 11 and this blog was composed March 3, 2014 at 3:45 am and according to my spirit guides it is time to blog and share what an a Empath is....
An Empath feels the emotions of others, and has an affect on them, their emotions and energy.
A person that is not an Empath has control over the emotional effect and doesn't allow themselves to feel the other persons energy, issues or emotions and sure doesn't feel their pain in their body, and can choose to take into consideration the other persons emotions or pains. They stay in their own bodies. They feel what they feel in their mind, body and soul, but let it go with ease. Where an Empath vibrates outside their body and has the gift (or is it a curse haha) of feeling other's emotions or pains because they usually observe and not absorb, where an Empath absorbs when they really should be observing and not absorbing! This can be very difficult especially if you don't know your body or understand what an Empath is.
I always say being an Empath makes me the amazing Reader and Healer that I am in my office- but not so amazing at the mall. It's actually over stimulating for me to be at the mall. I actually hate going to the mall. I avoid it if I can. It's funny how you realize things as you get older and learn your body. As a teenager I never wanted to go to the mall. I just didn't like it, but all of my friends frequented the mall often. Now I know why!
A few things I've learned and would like to share...
As an empath it is our job to choose who we surround ourselves with, who we spend our free time with, and who we choose to call friends.
Just because we have known someone forever or an even harder one is- the people we are related to- Just because we are related to someone doesn't mean we have to spend our free time with them if they aren't making us feel good or happy. Check- If after you're with someone you feel drained, stressed, irritated, annoyed, down or worried about them, you may want to consider shortening your time with that person.
I'm going to share with you that this has been a hard one for me all of my life. I have had a lot of not so loving, not so caring or helpful family members in my life. But I wouldn't change my past if I could, because it has made me the caring loving sportive strong woman, mother, friend and person that I am today. I treat people the way I want to be treated with love, compassion, empathy and light.
And because I am not selfish
I am a very caring helpful giving person and this my friends has sometimes got me into situations that have caused me some major grief. I mean be a supportive person bring a friend happiness, guidance and pleasure and then in turn if it causes you disappointments, let down and any feelings of regret them that's your body talking to you.
Example that comes forward and I can go back many many years ago before I had a child I used to babysit for friends so that they could go out and go on vacation and have fun or go back to work after having a child. Which was great, right?
They got to go out on the town, go on vacation, cruises, limos or simply go back to work and I got to help, be supportive, love their children, and do things like go to Chuck E Cheese or do art work or just hang out and spend quality time with their children. I love kids so babysitting was always fun for me and still is to this day!
As an Empath they never really had to ask me because I would offer the second I knew they needed something. Which for them was great-right? But for me.... Not so great! One friend actually had the nerve to say to me, "I didn't ask you-you offered!" As if... ugh! That was the official smack in the face wake up call. .. Because it wasn't a favor if I offered right?
Then I had a child. Most of these people I referred to as friends, that I babysat for frustrated me time and time again, because they weren't so willing to reciprocate the favors. They were married, busy, or just not around anymore. This showed up multiple times throughout my life when I needed a babysitter these friends were not as readily open helpful or even appreciative or wanted to help with babysitting favors with my child as I was with theirs.
It really hurt me and was really hard to understand.
Another example is much later on in life once I graduated from college and actually started working and doing readings I used to read my friends for free all of the time and that had its own set of issues. My definition of a friend is one that is there for your friends through thick and thin. I'd listen to them complain or vent, they'd listen to me vent and complain like we all do but once I started doing readings I would read them for free and provide guidance, messages from their loved ones, or predictions and then everytime they had a dilemma they would call me and I was expected to provide free readings and support like I always did. Because I would just openly offer advice or read them and friends for free in the past. It started to be expected, and this became a drain eventually I had to make changes.
I mean let's say if I were a nail lady would I be expected to do all of my friends nails for free? No! But because I'm not holding any tools or scissors I don't think they really looked at it as a job or service because I'm just talking right? . . One time probably in 2010 I had an issue where a friend of mine scheduled an appointment to do a (free) reading with me and when I wasn't able to be there right at the time she scheduled she got really nasty with me and that's when I realized something was wrong. It showed me to see that I wasn't having good boundaries. So now I try really hard and I don't read friends for free. They have to pay something. I funny care I if it's $20. Or dinner!
I always prayed that God will help me to have better spiritual boundaries. This has been a huge life lesson that has showed up multiple times over the years and just when I think I have it down someone or something shows up to tests me once again!
Bottom line is Empaths need to surround themselves with like minded people.
We can't help the world, well I guess we could try, but it would be exhausting. When you feel for someone or you feel another's pain, needs, or emotions and it overwelmed you, consumes your thoughts, or you feel their pain and you worry, that means you may be an Empath. This can be a difficult one for you as it was and is for me, because not everyone feels the emotion of others, plus it's a dog eat dog world. Or is it doggy doggy world? They both get to my point! Not everyone is out to help or even care to help others. Not everyone has that gift of feeling another person's emotions, caring for that person, providing service, offering or volunteering to help or connectors to that feeling that person's needs wants and desires its called an Empath.
It's our job to surround ourselves with like minded people if you pay attention to the qualities of life that those people choose it becomes quite easy to pick out who is and who is not a like-minded person. This like - minded person would have a mindset of what can I do for you in our relationship to help, not what can you do for me in this relationship, being a give-and-take type of relationship. It becomes kind of tricky when you have family or friends that you may known for 25 years but the good news is the more spiritual you become, the closer you get to God or the more you become more in touch with your higher self the harder it is to deal with letting them go, but the easier it is to detect these like-minded people. Because it'll be familiar when you leave these people you'll feel fulfilled you'll feel no drain, no negative emotion, no confusion and most important no shift in your energy. You may feel happy after you interact with them. It's important to checkin how you feel after you're with each and every person you come in contact with. You want to be okay with yourself when you leave and have positive emotions going through your veins maybe feel like you got help and maybe you help them too. Another important thing is not absorbing their pain and most importantly not offering help when they haven't asked for it.
We have free will and that means we can choose who we surround ourselves with and who we choose to help. Free will to let things go and move on or try to hold on and not suffer because your fighting for what you believe in, all the while hoping that the person will see the light. Just because you realize they need help doesn't mean you fix it, help fix it, or offer to fix it.
Just accept that people are people and just because we see and know they could make better choices doesn't mean they are ready to see that or accept it. I'm setting it free is something I say often. And really I'm allowing myself to be free to accept what is, when if I don't agree with what it is.
Another thing that I say is observe but not absorb.
Which brings me to my favorite quote I heard in college, which is on my business card... "The key to happiness is accepting what is."
This is what it is. So be it!
I'm sending love and light
I'm sorry is a set of words that people blurt out on demand when needed. When saying I'm sorry, there needs to be a certain emotion and energy that comes with those words.
There is a feeling and emotion that one puts out to the person receiving the apology.
When YOU realize that you have made a mistake or have done something to hurt someone another words you've done something you shouldn't have done, you say I'm sorry. Is that a reaction which is a set of words you learned to throw out when someone responds with pain or a negative emotion?
I'm sorry has to be a feeling and an emotion that you feel deep inside your heart. That feeling has to comes from your mind, body and soul. YOU say you're sorry because you feel their pain or your pain. It's packed with heartfelt energy.
When someone tells us we did something to hurt them we may say sorry- because its the right thing to do. I'm not saying that this is wrong I'm simply saying that if it isn't from your mind, body and soul and that emotion from inside that triggers those I'm sorry words. If not then it's most likely from your mind that logical side that tells you that you did something wrong and hurt that person so after that out comes these words. They are a learned reaction to an action. The ears send a message to the brain, that then tells the mouth to say something. It's because they are telling me it hurts so therefore when this action gets that reaction I say this! Two plus two equals four!
To say sorry and mean it is very important but more importantly after you say it, and only when you mean it, you need to ask if that person you apologized to accepts your apology, Very important step a lot of people are unaware of so it gets skipped. Which means we don't know if it was received.
Saying sorry not only allows that person to release the pain or hurt but it also allows you to release it. There is a great amount of healing that comes from admitting you were wrong or wronged someone and to come to terms with it and to be vulnerable enough to open up your heart is very healing for them but more for your mind, body and soul. But remember only if you really feel that emotion not if it a reaction to an action.
I am sorry if I hurt you. I really didn't mean it.
Thank you for reading and I hope that you learned something from reading my blogs.
I'm send you blessings.
This was originally composed on Jan 12, 2014
What is a booking fee? And why?
A booking fee is a charge for doing an in-office session. It's cheaper to do a Skype or phone session because you don't pay a booking fee. And I don't have to pay for office space because I'm working from the comfort of my home while you are in the comfort of yours. I always say if money is an issue then book a Skype or phone session. Your session results will be as accurate and clear as an in person session. I always joke around and say the only difference is you don't get a real hug, you get an electronic hug. LOL :)
A little history of why I require a booking fee when scheduling an office session with me?
I've been meeting with clients for a very long time and never had an issue but one Saturday morning long ago...I decided to start charging a booking fee because this lady booked an office session with me on a Saturday morning at 9 a.m. and didn't show up. I didn't get a call or email to cancel. She didn't answer her cell phone the three times I attempted to call as I waited on her arrival. I sat there wondering if she was okay or just decided to sleep in on her Saturday morning like I could have been doing!
It was a very disappointing and frustrating day for me that Saturday morning many months ago. I mean at that time I was trying to do 2 businesses and I'm a single only parent with health problems with challenges daily. I work very hard, my child has sports five days a week, sometimes six so for me to crawl out of bed at 730 in the morning on a Saturday morning to take a shower and get myself into the office by nine, I know now is and was asking a lot from my tired disabled self. Then for her to not even have the common courtesy to call or email or even answer her phone when I called her was just blatantly rude! As I sat in my office, eyes closed, talking to Spirit asking why... I heard my Angels chime in and say, things happen for a reason...
And that's when the messsage came to me to require a small booking fee to schedule an office session.
In the.. I don't know, maybe year that I've now been doing this I've had two people schedule a session and no-show. I know it makes a big difference now when someone doesn't show to their appointment at least I get paid something for the trip into the office. It's also a little compensation for the fact that another person could have scheduled a session during that time slot, so at least it accommodates my time slightly.
So today I have somebody booked at 2:15 that scheduled her second session with me a couple weeks ago and I called her 3 days ago to confirm because my spidey senses said call her plus I didn't collect a booking fee. I left her a message but I never heard back from her, and to be honest with all the dealings with my grandmother's funeral yesterday and the viewing the day before and all the preparations and family drama going on around me it never occurred to me that I didn't hear back from her. I do remember her she was a very very nice lady with relationship issues with a motorcycle gang boyfriend.
So this morning when I realized I never heard back from her I attempted to try to call her again and again left a message, because I have two other people that are trying to get in today and I don't have the time available. If she isn't coming in I could give that time slot to someone else.
She didn't answer. I still went to my office because you never know maybe her phone was lost, broken or. .. AND....the result....she didn't show and to this day (March 26, 2014) I have not heard from her.
Given her situation it makes me wonder if she's okay or not?!
These are a few reasons why I charge a booking fee. And I notice that people are more responsible when they have a few bucks on the line. If they're not going to show up then they make sure they cancel or reschedule which allows me to give that time slot to somebody else. After all I am running a business here. ;)
Intuitive Energy Healer, Psychic Medium and Conscious Channel. A gifted healer and deliverer of messages from our Guides, Angels, and Divine Source!